To call something a fad, is to think of it as a passing fancy; something to entertain us for the time being, and then move on. A few years ago I had not heard of DNA testing except on TV cop shows. Now it seems that everyone is having the tests done to determine their ancestry and ethnicity. Not to be left behind, I spent yesterday afternoon spitting into a tiny plastic tube, to accumulate 1/4 inch of my precious saliva. At the age of 90 what do I hope to find? Will it prove my indomitable Grandmother wrong in her assertion that we stem from strong English stock with perhaps a drop of Irish blood derived from my sweet Grandpa? This of course does not include any scientific information from my paternal side. Grandma was quick to overlook anything she did not have an interest in. At any rate, it is a talking point and shows I am not entirely behind times.
I was feted royally by friends and family to acknowledge the undeniable fact that I have reached the vaunted age of 90. Dr. Advice reached this pinnacle two years ago, and when I saw the advanced age did him no harm, it removed the stigma I feared might occur. Though I have never been one to dwell on age, it is now amazing to me that I have so many friends who are in their 90’s and still upright and active.
Granted that some people need a little help one way or another as they age. My high school group in Alameda has increased from the original 6-7, as one is now in assisted living and her daughter brings her to the luncheon. Two others bring daughters who drive them now, and I have a good friend who does the same for me. The important thing is that we still come, and our intentions are still good.
We offer “tea and sympathy when needed as well, when we heard that one of our members is being forced out of her home. She gave the home some time ago to her daughter and son in law, but still lived in it. Her daughter passed away last year, and now the son-in-law is moving and plans to sell the house. A clear case of legal elder abuse. Another classmate a few years ago sold her home in Washington state at the request of her daughter and son in law and moved to Texas into an apartment which she hates. She has lost all her long time friends and her money from the sale of her house has been used to support her daughter and unemployed son in law. This is not to put sons-in-law in a a bad light, as I have had very good luck along that line.
All this proves is that as older people we need to stay aware. Hopefully Life has given us some measure of health and where-with-all, with a few brains left to protect both. We don’t need to become pistol packing mamas, but we do need to realize that we have become vulnerable and targets for those out to get somebody. anybody.
There are things to think about as elders though, which were’t a problem in our youth. Some communities have internet sign up groups to put people in touch with handymen, dog walkers, house cleaners, gardeners, and what have you. Chores which we once did for ourselves, but which require more muscle than we have left. Shopping can be a problem as well. We are awaiting the renewal of Dr.A’s driving license and mulling over possibilities to get to wherever in the possibility that he will someday have to stop driving. Last week we did a trial run with Uber to the local Safeway store and back. A good experience and relieved any anxiety we might have had.
Ninety is shaping up and they can start planning my 95th!